Well, the day started off with a fight right out of the gates. My daughter was completely ticked off about the lack of choices for breakfast. Doors were slamming, she was yelling, the dog wanted outside, and I was confused and trying to calm her down. Admittedly we were low on groceries, but in my favor she did overreact! I suggested yogurt, some waffles, fruit, but she was having none of it. She wanted Cracklin‘ Oat Bran and we didn’t have it so she wasn’t eating. I’d put that in the avoiding food category! I finally got her to eat 5 graham cracker squares. One win in her column.
We got ourselves ready to go and after a last minute change of plans for her sisters riding with, we set out on our own for the hospital. Now I have to say that on a Sunday morning, hardly anyone is on the highway and it was a very pleasant ride in. She listened to her MP3 player and I listened to mine (on the stereo, of course). She pauses a bit to tell me which girls were texting her from group. It’s good to see them all getting along.
Now, while she’s at the hospital, I’d like to say that my other two girls clean the house and help out with an understanding that I’m overwhelmed, but they don’t. Every once and awhile a few things will get done but for the most part, they’re just angry. Angry, or perhaps jealous, of the attention that is being “lavished” on their sister. As an adult this makes little sense, but I can see how they would feel that way. I try to talk to them about the situation but I still intercept little comments and jabs about it. And I think of how they’ve learned this kind of pack animal behavior and at what point their sister became dinner. Okay, funny choice of an analogy there! I imagine this will be the week they get in on our family therapy sessions that have so far been me and my daughter.
Instead of coming home to a clean house, I come home to no one. Everyone is gone only I don’t know where. I’m not thrilled. I text them and leave for groceries as my time is limited before I have to be back. I locate one daughter and she goes with me.
When we’ve arrived back home from shopping, my other daughter is still nowhere to be found. Now I’m ticked. I call her and she comes home. But she’s still angry about how the youngest is the favorite, like children’s only takes the best of the best from a family! I tell her maybe we could just get a wing on the psych ward unit. She doesn’t think that’s funny.
At 4:30 I leave for the hospital. I can leave a bit later on Sunday because the traffic is awesome. And I have the most pleasant time with God.
My daughter has had a good day! They were treated to mini facials as a Sunday treat. I should mention that these fun little treats are done amongst some pretty intense group sessions dealing with anxiety, anger, why they let the eating disorder run their lives, etc. In addition to that, she didn’t have to supplement today so it’s a successful day. Dinner was also a success. This evening it was only her and I. Once again I sat our table in the middle where she’d be less apt to have a meltdown about her food. We had a wonderful conversation while eating as she told me of her day and her friends.
Part of the disorder is learning to eat again at scheduled times and all of it. The disorder as made them hate food and avoid it. That’s why there is often a fight involved with a meal. And perhaps where the OCD part comes in! Then the anxiety starts because they have to eat it. So that’s a reason you can’t just say “eat the dang food”! It won’t work for you.
On our way south for the evening, we were treated to an awesome lightning show, then drove into the rain and enjoyed the soothing sounds of it. And I’m reminded of just how great our God is:)